NORMAL LIFE INDEX

AUGUST 2008
- That Was June
- Wanna Hear YouTube Videos?
- Facebook Ridiculousness!
- Dancing With Miss Knight!
- Could Have Been So Much Worse
- KYLIE: 'The One' Video
- Can National Languages Change?
- KYLIE: You're Getting Boring!
- Stunning Start to Beijing 2008
- Oz Countdown - 25 Days
- No Going Back
- Devon & Cornwall, Wales & Saying Goodbye

JULY 2008
- England & Wales
- Importance Of Integration
- Oz Countdown - 50 Days
- Tools Is Cool!
- Country Ditching
- A Long Way
- Miss Minogue, OBE
- My Own Vanity & The Boss' Envy
- Planning, But Not!

JUNE 2008
- The Weekend In Oulu
- Catalonian Midsummer
- The Admired Disappointment
- Off To Barca!
- Oz Countdown - 75 Days
- Ireland Rightly Says No!
- Did Kylie Wow Helsinki?
- Kylie Wows Helsinki Tonight
- Bruce Does Scandinavia
- Generic medicine, anyone?
- Holiday Season Begins
- Bruce Has Arrived!

MAY 2008
- That Was Spring
- Free Hugs Campaign
- The Day After The Eurovision
- Oz Countdown - 100 Days
- Second Semi Final Review [ESC]
- First Semi Final Review [ESC]
- Belgrade Calling!
- That Bloody Banjo!
- Helsinki's Spring Flowers
- When Queens Use Queens English
- KylieX2008 Dazzles Europe
- Eurovision 2008 - My Faves!
- Check Out Lisbon
- The Road To Töölö
- Crematorium Daffs
- Taivallahti Marina
- Typical French Timing
- Töölönlahti
- Helsinki's Old City Falls
- The Best 'Alternative' Vappu

APRIL 2008
- Being 31!
- Rough Family & Fun Friends
- Kylie Wows The States
- A Convenient Verdict?
- All Coming Together...?
- Me & My Gay i-Pod Are Conforming
- Who Needs English?

MARCH 2008
- The South African Adventure!
- The Two Executives Spouting Hot Air
- My Photographic Grade
- Lisbon Beckons
- Ecliptic Images Goes Live!
- The Flies & The Solitary Shit Down The Disco
- Photography Exercise - 'Flowers'
- My Schizophrenia
- Let The People Decided, Gordon
- I Can Feel It In My Waters
- Got Soul?
- Good Nights Out Are Coming

FEBRUARY 2008 (Detox Month)
- Detox Ends
- She Wants A Screwdriver, Not A Hammer!
- Detox - I Fell Off The Wagon
- Entertaining Gym Characters
- Detox - Down from 89.9 to 86.1
- The AIDS Timebomb
- Happy Valentines Day!
- Detox (Impressive Weight Loss)
- Lessons in Pharmacology
- Detox (Review of First Week)
- Detox (Day 4 of 29)
- The Art In Other People's Houses
- Detox Commences (Day 1 of 29)

JANUARY 2008
- Trip Pix Become Clips - Video Blog Launched!
- South Africa On Film
- Ditching Season 2008
- Kylie, The Faghag!
- Good Luck, Sarkozy!
- Kylie Set To WOW!
- My Plea Might Just Work
- 2008, A Year Like No Other?

DECEMBER 2007
- That Was 2007
- Merry Christmas (With Buns)
- I Am Away - Bound For South Africa
- Solarium Stupidity
- Was I Kylie?
- My Submission
- MY World Tour - 2008 ** UPDATED **
- My Blog Turns 2!
- Finland Turn 90!
- The Proof Is In The Education
- Dumb Contestants On British Quiz Shows


NOVEMBER 2007
- We All Need Someone Who Understands
- Kylie To Tour, Including Finland!
- Monumental Shades of [Helsinki] Grey
- Mustn't Grumble
- She Is Just A Singer
- Kylie's 'One', The As Yet Unreleased Track
- Finnish Consumerism
- No More Bananas!
- The flirt, the German and Nothing Ever Changes!
- Ridiculous Laws Of Britain
- Jokela Shooting
- Capturing The Colour
- How 16 Became 5
- 6 Years In Finland


OCTOBER 2007
- Making Life Easier
- Princess Diana, The Latest Book
- How Is My Photography?
- Japanese Company
- How Coca Cola Changed
- 'The Upgrade' & 'Shopping In London'
- Only Great Minds Can Read This
- Du Yu Speek Inglish?
- Who, How, Why?
- What To Believe?
- Personal Tax Victory
- In Lieu Of Words
- My Photographic Start
- Not A Normal Weekend
- Friday Again and Time For Music!
- Penniless In Tampere & Return of the Expelled


SEPTEMBER 2007
- They're Letting Me In!
- Moving On And On And On?!
- Decisions, Decisions, Decisions!
- Mood Enhancing Image
- The Expelled
- American Frustrations
- Imperial Victory Over Brussels
- Half Of My Wisdom
- How Planning To Make A Plan Backfired
- A Quickie In Tampere
- Kids Abroad, Piss & Dumb Damon

AUGUST 2007
- Ten Years On
- You Know What's Coming...
- Family, Hearing, Friends & Gay Pride
- Gay Pride Pictorial
- Getting Over Elvis
- My First Piece... Of Art!
- When The Bust Comes..
- The Midget-Express, the Pope, the Gypsy & The Troublemaker
- Roasting Rome (~33°C)
- Away Again - Off To Rome!
- Love, And How Difficult It Is To Forget
- What Have You Done?

JULY 2007
- Asian Anti-Britishness
- It's All North, Innit?
- New Harry Potter Over Voddy!
- I Am Away!
- Sibelius Monument (Real Art)
- The ’Notion’ Of Family
- 'Täti-ness' (with Agatha Christie & The Warm Fire)
- Bree, The 'strange' Artist
- Will You Answer The Call?
- Time To Stop Smoking

JUNE 2007
- Why?
- MidSummer 2007
- MidSummer 2007 (Pic-Preview)
- Unlikely Source Of Inspiration
- Just Another Summer Weekend
- I Know That Guy!
- What Is A Natter?
- Americans In A Classy Place
- The 'Old', the 'New' & The Unborn
- Am I A Party Pooper (Again)?
- My Fave Kylie Pic Ever
- The Challenge Of Baldy & Blondie
- Anyone For Spotted Dick?
- Helsinki ♥ Kylie...
- Global Peace Index - Finland Comes 6th!
- New Finnish Law - No Smoking In Public Places

MAY 2007
- Beautiful, But Deadly
- Gays Standing Up For Themselves
- Airport Amusement
- Am I A Party Pooper?
- Where Is Madeleine?
- Shameful Streisand
- 64/105 = 61%
- Scooch
- A Week At The Home from Home
- Eurovision Is Over, A Trip To UK in Order.
- Was The Semi Final A Fix (Eurovision)?
- Stunned By Semi Final Outcome (Eurovision)
- More Public Appearances (Eurovision)
- Eurovision Fever Takes Hold
- Helsinki Calling...
- That Russian Outpost
- How Can You Be Ungrateful... Graciously...
- Standing Up To GI Jane

APRIL 2007
- Off Somewhere (A Bit) Warmer
- Confrontation = Bad Guy
- Life Is Too Short
- Thoughts At 30!
- South Africa For Christmas
- You Know You’ve Learnt Something When...
- Apparently, I'm Self Centred!
- T - 39 Days & Counting (Eurovision)
- Hong Kong What?
- Helsinki Complaints Choir

MARCH 2007
- Need For Unity
- Business In Brussels
- Wouldn't You Want To Know?
- Finnish Management: Is It Me Or Is It Them?
- Over-Socialising & Too Much Relaxing!
- No More 'How Are You?'
- Queen Camilla
- Bored, Bald, Bold.
- Different Aspiration, Same Future?
- What Does HE Know?

FEBRUARY 2007
- Finns And Their Babies!
- What's In A Number?
- When In Rome..
- Can 'Britishness' Be Taught?
- Setting An Example For Child Harmers
- When It's 39.7°C
- Another Day In Europe
- Partying, Audiologists, Dentists, Snow, Bingo, Sushi & In Manchester For One Night Only!
- I Can't Hold The Silence Any Longer
- I Was Right (Nearly!)
- Lucky To Be Away!
- Why Do I Bother (Again)?!

JANUARY 2007
- Croatian Summer Now Online!
- Helsinki Zoo International Ice Sculpture Competition
- Air Passenger Duty - Is This Legal?
- Imagine With Snow..
- Fathers With Something To Say
- Scottish Nationalism Threats Unity
- Is Mother Nature Commoditising Heat?
- Crossing Confusion
- Can Kids Learn To Be Shy?
- That Pink Jumper & Bird Flu
- Read Before You Start
- 90th Year Of Independence
- Has Winter Come And Gone?
- New Year, New Start, Ditching Begins!

DECEMBER 2006
- A Year Of Acheivement
- Do Christmas Differently
- No Longer Blue (Because of Blue)
- All You Need Is Laughs!
- My Second One Year
- Bree Turns 40!
- Giving & Taking - Taxes
- Last Night's Cry
- That Christmas Feeling

NOVEMBER 2006
- We NEED The Queen (Mail On Sunday, 1/10/2006)
- Looking At Me, The New MSc?
- Why Do I Bother?!
- Chilling Out Up North!
- 5 Years In Finland
- British youths ‘among worst in Europe’ (FT, Nov 3rd)
- Taxes, Taxis & Taxi-ing!

OCTOBER 2006
- Halloween Ain't The Same Anymore!
- Why Try To Eliminate Me?
- Men And Their Boy's Toys!
- Are Your Descendents Going to be Gorgeous or Hobbits?
- Are Black Kids Today's Must-Have Accessory?
- I Should Have Been An Orthopaedic Specialist
- A Literal Pain In The Neck
- Winter Is Coming!
- Finland On YouTube
- Training In London
- Run Over A What?!
- A Full Fee For Half A Service!

SEPTEMBER 2006
- One Hell Of A Woman's Problem!
- Studying Finnish...Again!
- Popeye, My Engineer
- First Time In Lapland: 8th - 11th September, 2006
- Understanding Mrs. Hyde's Behaviour
- Nick in London (1st-3rd of September, 2006)
- Dr Jeckyl & Mrs Hyde
- A Bit Of Reflection

AUGUST 2006
- The New Face of H&M is...
- United 93
- Planet Madness
- Stonehenge, Oxford & A Birthday (17-20 August)
- The Girl From Down Under Doing The Right Thing!
- Why Didn't We Think Of It Sooner?
- Business & Pleasure In Chicago - 28 July - 4 August
- Words Of Wisdom
- Promotions & Old Applications

JULY 2006
- Greetings from Chicago
- Croatian Summer (Part 2) - Sibenik & Split
- Croatian Summer (Part 1) - Zagreb, Plitvice, Zadar & Sibenik
- Finland's EU Presidency Begins!
- Eurovision Review
- Extreme Weather - I Hate Psychologists!

JUNE 2006
- Telling The Redhead
- Boss Has Gone
- MidSummer 2006
- That Shitty Feeling!
- A 70th, a 30th, a (mistaken) 40th And My Father!
- Silence Is Golden
- Sandal Scandal
- Read About A Modern Slave
- Bring It Home!
- The Big C

MAY 2006
- Happy Birthday, Kylie!
- Harry Potter Sadness
- Religious Holidays & Religious Movies
- Trust Me, I’m A Surgeon!
- Eurovision Madness In Athens!
- Not Bad... For An Englishman!
- Leaves On The Trees
- The Hill That Drives Me Up The Wall!
- Bizarre Friday & The Liberal New Best Friend!
- Haven't Started Work, Yet Already Stressed!
- Ten Days In UK
- It's Vappu Again!

APRIL 2006
- Her Maj Turns 80!
- Racism In Helsinki!
- Smiley Kylie Is Back!
- Let The Bidding Commence?!
- Me, According To Bree
- Rant & Rave Published
- Happy Birthday To Someone Special Down Under!
- My Name Is Madonna And I Am A Capitalist
- EU Enlargement - When Will It End?
- Spelling Mistakes Are A Small Price To Pay!

MARCH 2006
- Decisions, decisions!
- Bored, But Better!
- Tick-tock, tick-tock!
- SummerTime & My Waiting Game!
- Mother's, Ain't They Fantastic?
- The Contrasts Of Gran Canaria
- Off On My Hols!
- Dissertation Phase Begins!
- Student Protest
- Ski-Jumping / My Show On Ice!
- Jobseeker's Amusement
- White Man's Self-Perceived Superiority!
- Jobseeker's frustration

FEBRUARY 2006
- Shrove Tuesday / Pancake Day
- So Close To Victory In Olympic Ice Hockey!
- Service Ain't What It Used To Be!
- Tits In The Gym
- I Hate Tax
- Finland's Public Transport & Language
- Smoking Ban In All Pubs & Clubs
- Fertility: Sensibility vs. Equality
- Finland To Build World's Largest Passenger Vessel
- Nailbiting - Kicking The Habit!
- The Friends We Never See
- Winter Olympics 2006
- Do we know too much about the state of the world?
- Music As Memory
- Kylie Minogue
- Good News Followed By Bad
- Men are under pressure too!
- Master's Assignment Submission
- House price madness
- Brokeback Mountain, go and see it!
- Allow me to introduce Bree, my 'wife'.

JANUARY 2006
- Finland re-elects current President
- Who remembers Connect 4?
- Australia, my only regret
- Some photos for a change
- There's something you should know
- Back in the classroom
- Feeling old
- Cold weather continues
- Weekend in England
- First day in new job!

FLASHBACK #2: My First Weekend in Finland!

I remember driving along after leaving Hanko docks - the single lane two-way route was lined with tall, slim dark trees. Very rarely in England did you come across such tall trees so close to the roadside. Anyhow, as the clouds grew lighter, I was unsure if it would get any light or not as people had warned me that the Finnish Autumn and Winter had to be seen to be believed.

One of my colleagues had faxed me a map and I followed it religiously, first heading towards Helsinki, then turning off onto the E3 which would take me all 170 km's to Tampere. I had agreed to pop into the office first and, from there, I would be escorted to my new home. I remember stopping halfway, at Hämmenlinna, for a coffee. I was so tired and stiff - this was my first time driving on the 'other side' as they do on the Continent and I must have been gripping the steering wheel so tightly, not sure whether or not I was heading the right way.

As I continued along the E3, a sign for Tampere came up. Forty minutes later, I had turned off and was navigating the roads leading to the unimpressive looking building where I would spend the next nearly-two years working. I parked the car and headed to the second floor where a number of colleagues were waiting to greet me, relieved that I had survived one of the worst storms in the Baltic Sea in 10 years; that had seemed like a long time ago after the little driving adventure.

Anyway, they had arranged some kind of 'getting to meet one another session' over coffee and cake. Before leaving the office, I was handed a mobile phone and a laptop by the HR Manager, a gentle man in his late 50's. He explained that the mobile phone was free to use, to call home whenever I wanted. He said the laptop is to be used for my work, but can be used at home whenever needed. With all the official stuff done and dusted, a young bossy-looking girl showed me the local supermarket, before I followed her in my car to my new home.

I was amazed. And honoured. The apartment was brand new, I had my own parking space. This was my first own home; I would be able to come and go as I pleased, no Mum & Dad to clock in with, no elder sisters to obey! My colleague left quite quickly, saying she would see me in office on Monday! She left me standing by the window that led onto a balcony surrounded by glass windows. She had left me! It was only Wednesday and I wasn't expected in until the Monday. And I had no map of the local area, no local knowledge. I had been amazed at my new home, then stunned that I had been left to 'get on with it'.

With my colleagues' departure came snow. I stood by the window leading to the balcony and huge fluffy bits of snow started to fall. Part of me was in awe, the other part wondering what the hell I had done! If it was already snowing at the beginning of November, that meant there was a long winter in store.

After the initial amazement of the falling snow, I got on with the task of emptying my car. Fortunately, the Company provided all the basics. Everything was new and, over the course of four days, I found a home for my own possessions. By the Saturday morning, the place was looking good. Several times, I felt pangs of loneliness, constantly wondering if I had done the right thing or not. On the Saturday morning, I decided to call my parents. They were relieved to hear from me. I filled them in in what had happened so far, but they just wanted to know if I was warm enough, if I had enough food (which reminded me of the box my sister had packed, containing sugar, salt, soap etc. as we didn't know if Finland had these things!), if I was happy, healthy etc.

The phone call ended with a grin on my face - it was then that I realised that, with the newfound ability to hear, if I ever needed someone to talk to then I could just pick up the phone. I had been in the house for three days - I hadn't left it once, but was determined to. I really had no idea where the centre of town was - part of me was afraid to go there in case I caused an accident in my 'funny car' with the steering wheel on the 'wrong side'. I grabbed the bull by the horns, put on lot's of warm clothing, got in the car and spent an hour or so just driving around.

The centre was easy to find, less than 3km away - I simply followed the signs for 'keskusta' (centre) and reminded myself to stay on the right! The main street, Hameenkatu, was criss-crossed with dozens of streets and, in time, I discovered two huge lakes, Näsijärvi to the north of the city and Pyhäjrvi to the south, which was very close to my apartment. More information can be found on Tampere at http://www.tampere.fi/

As I drove through the centre of the city, I watched the people... They looked very different from people back home, pale skinned, but well dressed and mostly slim. In the chill of the day, people rushed from place to place, darting in and out of stores. It was late Saturday afternoon and I headed home, with nothing planned. It was already dark and pushing 4pm. The evening was spent having a sauna - I had one in my own apartment - and reading what remained of Big Brother, the book version of the recently completed first series.

Sunday was another uneventful day, but on this day I took a long walk around the lake and took in the town on foot. My mission was to learn more about the town, find out where the video stores were, where there might be a gym or a library. It was a crisp, very blue day and as I walked around Phyäjärvi, the various chimney's that dotted the Tampere skyline emitted white whispy smoke.

Later that day, after eating dinner and getting familiar with my laptop, I started to prepare for my first day at work. I didn't know what to expect from the job, but I was sure that it would be something new, something challenging. So far, the people had been great and I yearned to be back with the people and have a daily purpose. Nothing can describe how lonely I felt during what was my first weekend in Finland.