NORMAL LIFE: Why?

We end this month asking 'why?'

• Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?
• If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
• Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
• Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
• Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
• Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
• Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
• Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
• Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
• If you can measure the speed of light, what is the speed of darkness?
• If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?
• Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
• How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
• Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Did you ever stop and wonder......

• Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
• Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
• Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
• Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream ??
• If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
• If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
• If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
• Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
• Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
• Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

My favourites are...

• Why does your Obstetrician/ Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
• Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?