NORMAL LIFE: Setting An Example For Child Harmers

I wrote recently, during a visit to the UK, that my country had 'somewhat depressed' me, what with the tales of paedophilia, rape, racism and child abuse filling the daily papers. In the exact same week as my visit, three men were found guilty of conspiracy to rape and sentenced to between 8-11 years in jail for 'planning another Soham' (see here).

Online, in a chat room, the three men planned to pounce on two young girls, aged 13 and 14, on their way home from school, exchanging indecent pictures of young children as they did so. While the three men had never come into contact with eachother nor their prospective victims, the police used chat transcripts - which readily identified the victims and the locations and explained what they planned to do to the children - as the basis for the charge. While the conviction might be seen as lacking any material evidence, the fact is that "these three men took a step beyond fantasy" while making reference to the Soham muders (see here).

Why do I feel a need to write about such an awful subject? On February 9th, I read this article, which points out that we all have a role to play in stamping out this lurid and disgusting behaviour. Living in Finland, I often see TV shows depicting British tourists on holiday and, continuously, I'm faced with images of English women wearing next to nothing. This is totally acceptable, isn't it, because it sells TV programs? Isn't it possible that our exposure to such images has desensitised our respect for the body, somehow made it less taboo to tamper with it? And how is this different to Finns going to the sauna naked together? First of all, men and women sauna separately. Secondly, the act of going to the sauna has no sexual connotations, at least not for those who are right in the head.

Yes, I personally believe that men like those convicted have a screw loose; either they are born that way, or something has made them that way, but allowing women to cavort in next to nothing simply feeds the imagination of these monsters. Personally, as a gay man, when I see a woman wearing next to nothing on a Friday night out, I do tend to think to myself: she's asking for trouble. So why do an increasing amount of women insist on dressing in this way? It's all to do with women's low self esteem in the 21st Century, which has been brewing for quite some time; firstly, there was the countless number of diets launched in the 90's by every celebrity known to humanity, followed by excessive media coverage professing to know how a 'real' women should present herself. Millions of women suddenly became self-analysing freaks, which spawned TV shows such as the anorexic I'm-so-successful Ally McBeal and Sex & The City, where women presented themselves as objects to be seduced.

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The fact that Bel Mooney managed to even get her article published is testament to the Daily Mail's determination not to simply sweep this issue under the carpet. Indeed, there is alot that the media could do if it would just stop portraying women primarily as sexual objects. What the media could also do is continuously inform readers on how to surf the internet safely. But Bel Mooney is right: "How can we teach them to show restraint when there is little or no restraint in the culture around them?" When a friend visited Finland recently, I asked if he wanted to come to the sauna with me. Almost immediately, he made suggestive noises and I realised then that British people have alot to learn about what is acceptable and what isn't.

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Next time you see Girls Aloud or the Pussy Cat Dolls on TV, ask yourself what is to be gain from the fact that they may be wearing next to nothing? What signal is this sending out to your child? What is to stop your child dressing up like these tarts on-stage, and 'getting what they deserve' the minute they are out of your sight? While the media can play it's part, parenting in the UK is primarily to blame. The police set an example this time by convicting three men who, in fact, had never even met their victims. But will they stop your child becoming a victim?