NORMAL LIFE: Can Kids Learn To Be Shy?

It's amazing what kids pick up on, and its not childhood illnesses or diseases I am talking about. I was watching the evening news recently on Finnish television. A reporter was looking for people - parents with children, to be more precise - to interview in a Shopping Centre. Upon approaching prospective interviewees, I noticed on each occasion how the interviewee's children shied away from the camera, longing somewhat to be as far away from the interviewer as possible.

In the past (see here), I have written about how Finn's possess three distinct characteristics: modesty, silence and a limited ability to socialise. One thing I didn't expect was for this to be confirmed, on television among children aged as young as three and upto the age of ten or so. It just goes to show how much, on a cultural level, we learn - or copy - from our parents. Conversely, in the UK, the situation is very much the opposite with children clamouring for attention; this is supported by studies that indicate that citizens in English-speaking countries actually find it difficult to remain quiet in the company of others for more than ten seconds. Of course, there are the shy exceptions, but I'm convinced that if they did a study, Finnish kids would be found to be overwhelmingly much shier - and quieter - than British kids.

I have my own evidence that supports this claim, but perhaps it's not representative. My niece is three years old and Bree has three godchildren aged four, six and seven. My niece, the youngest, is much more lively and social than the three elder ones put together. Given my family's own demeanour, it's hardly surprising my niece is a chatterbox. Likewise, given what I would describe as the relatively conservative nature of the godchildrens' two sets of parents, it's unsuprising the children are somewhat reserved.

This is an interesting observation because the more time Bree and I spend together the more he understands just how different Finnish people are. While all nationalities are different, this reservedness really is something that defines Finnish behaviour. Whilst admirable in the sense that Finns take the time to think things through before they react, it's one of those annoying characteristics as it often takes alcohol - that staple food of the Finnish diet - to bring out the social part of the person. Interesting, very interesting!